Ellie Simmonds adopted
TV

Ellie Simmonds finally meets her birth mother, who ‘wanted her dead’ and ‘rejected her as a baby’ because of her dwarfism

She was given up for adoption at just 10 days old

| Updated:

Ellie Simmonds went on a heartbreaking journey of discovery in her ITV documentary Finding My Secret Family last year, in which she went in search of the reasons why she was adopted.

The multiple Gold Medal-winning Paralympian explored the relationship between disability and adoption in the hour-long show. She discovered that she was put in foster care at just 10 days old because of her dwarfism.

Ellie – who was born with achondroplasia – followed her own adoption journey and tracked down her birth mother, who she finally met after 28 years on the show

Here’s everything you need to know about why Ellie Simmonds was adopted, and her journey on ITV’s Finding My Secret Family.

Ellie Simmonds as a young school girl in uniform
Ellie Simmonds as a young girl (Credit: Flicker Productions/ITV)

Why was Ellie Simmonds adopted?

Ellie Simmonds was placed in foster care from 10 days old, and later adopted by Val and Steve. She was brought up with four siblings, all of whom were adopted.

Ellie said: “Until now, it’s never emotionally affected me, it never made me feel rejected or ask why do my birth parents not want me. I’ve been so focussed on the future and never thought about it.”

She added: “One of the reasons for being given up for adoption is because of dwarfism and maybe it can be a factor of why my personality is like it is now, because of that rejection at the start. Even if you do have a loving family being rejected straight away, like as soon as you were born.”

After questioned started to “bubble up” about her real birth family, Ellie went in search of the truth about her bloodline.

Ellie’s birth mother felt ‘very guilty’

She discovered that, shortly after her birth, the hospital confirmed that Ellie had achondroplasia. Her mother, who struggled to bond with her newborn daughter, was given an information sheet which read: “Children have to deal with being stared at and laughed at by other children. Indeed, there are those with normal height who equate short stature with evil and stupidity.”

Ellie said: “Evil and stupid? Can you imagine reading that and thinking, that’s my child? In a way, I understand, when you don’t know anything about the disability and you get this. You’re going to be scared.”

A report from a social worker stated that Ellie’s birth mother felt “very guilty”. Shockingly, the report also states that Ellie’s mum wished either that she’d “had an abortion or that Ellie had died”.

Ellie revealed her shock, saying: “Oh wow, she wanted me dead.” She later added: ‘It’s hard, because you’d hope if your child isn’t what you’d expected, you’d stick with it. I’m small, that’s it.”

Ellie’s mother, a single parent, made the decision to give her newborn daughter up for adoption after two days.

Ellie Simmonds with the Murray family
Ellie Simmonds with the Murray family, whose daughter also has a disability (Credit: ITV)

Ellie met her birth mother for the first time

Talking about her mum’s reasons for giving her up, Ellie – on the new series of Cooking With The Stars – said: “It’s fear; fear of who I am, of my dwarfism. If I had been born average height, and born how my older sister was, would I not have been adopted?”

During the course of filming, Ellie learnt that both her birth parents are alive and living in the UK. In fact, her mother lives in the same area as Ellie.

She said: “This could be life-changing. This woman carried me for nine months, but I don’t even know her.”

After exchanging several letters, Olympic superstar Ellie finally met her birth mother during the filming of the ITV documentary. They spent nearly five hours together in a hotel.

After the meeting an emotional Ellie said: “It was amazing. We didn’t even realise the time We were howling with laughter; we have the same sense of humour.

“I think it’s really helped that finding out who I am, looking at someone who birthed me, the nature that I’m from and the questions I had to ask her and she answered them it makes you a bit more whole.”

She added: “Although I have no idea how all this will play out, I’m glad I’ve gone through this process – questions I’ve carried for years have been answered.

“I’m proud of my life and I love my family and maybe, perhaps, that family just got bigger.”

Meanwhile, Ellie’s birth mother has suffered with her mental health, and the “guilt for not being strong enough to cope”. She admitted that she “thinks about Ellie every day”. Her identity has been protected as Ellie fears she’ll be judged. However, Ellie and her birth mum have stayed in contact, and her adoptive family are supportive.

Birth father ‘wanted to make contact’

Ellie was also given access to the social worker notes from the time of her adoption, and was surprised to hear news about her dad. Her birth father, who was separated from her real mum, had expressed a desire to keep in contact with Ellie.

As Ellie read the documents, she said: “Oh wow, this next bit describes that my birth father wanted me to make contact with him after I was 18 years old.”

However, she found no reference to her mother wanting to keep in touch.

During the documentary, Ellie did not meet her birth father, and there was no explanation as to why.

Nikita Kuzmin smiling with Ellie Simmonds on Strictly
Ellie Simmonds was paired up with Nikita Kuzmin on Strictly (Credit: BBC iPlayer)

Ellie Simmonds: My Secret Family on ITV

On the ITV documentary Ellie Simmonds: My Secret Family, the Strictly star spent time with families who adopted disabled children. She heard deeply personal stories from disabled people who tried to find their birth parents, only to be rejected again. The documentary highlighted the pioneering work of social services teams around the UK.

Ellie explored barriers on both sides of the adoptive process – both social and institutional – and asked if we are perpetuating an unfounded stigma around having disabled children.

From probing the existence of in-built systemic bias from the moment of birth, to a lack of awareness, Ellie’s mission is to investigate and unravel this complex issue.

During the documentary, Ellie broke down when she tracked down the family that fostered her briefly when she was just three months old. She was also moved to hear that her foster mum suspected Ellie went on to become the famous swimmer.

Read more: Strictly’s Ellie Simmonds reveals she was adopted aged three months as she finds birth mum who ‘wishes she’d died’

YouTube video player

Ellie Simmonds: Finding My Secret Family is on ITVX. Cooking With The Stars is on Tuesdays at 8pm on ITV1.

What do you think of Ellis Simmonds’ parents giving her up for adoption? Leave us a comment on our Facebook page @EntertainmentDailyFix.


Helen Fear
TV Editor

Related Topics