Busted star Matt Willis has revealed his difficult childhood may be a part of the reason he’s a recovering addict.
The musician and actor, 40, bares all in the brutally honest documentary Matt Willis: Fighting Addiction, which airs on Wednesday, May 17, 2023.
In the hour-long programme, Matt opens up about his past and takes an extensive look into his battle with drugs and alcohol. He examines how it has pushed him to the edge, and his daily struggle to keep himself clean and sober.
The film looks back at some of Matt’s darkest days as he begins to explore what could be behind his addiction. In emotional scenes, Matt meets up with his brother, and together they revisit their childhood home, to see if the roots of his addictions can be found in their shared past…
Matt discusses his addiction in new BBC One documentary
During the emotionally raw documentary Matt Willis: Fighting Addiction, the dad-of-three hints at a “violent” childhood.
Matt, who is married to Emma Willis, admits that during his worst moments, he “couldn’t get to 12 o’clock without drinking or using”.
He also confesses to using up to “six grams of coke every day” when he relapsed five years ago, something he lives in fear of happening again.
During the documentary, Matt admits he was “very good at keeping my abuse hidden”, and hints at the reasons why he may find release in substance abuse.
Matt Willis blames ‘violent’ childhood for addiction
During the BBC One documentary, Matt hints at a “violent” and troubled childhood. Something which he believes may have contributed to his dependency on drink and drugs.
However, he also admits that “he’s scared of looking into the past” with a therapist.
He meets with his brother Darren, who he admits he hasn’t seen for years.
Matt reveals: “As soon as I was 16, I moved away from home as far as possible. And never really went back. I was a little kid, and chasing oblivion. Everyone thought it was funny. But there was a sadness there.
“Our childhood was messy. My mum and dad got divorced when I was three, and my stepdad moved in when I was five. And we had a very heated relationship. I have a lot of pain around that.”
He admits that “for 20 years, I’ve been avoiding therapy that looks into my childhood”.
Later scenes show Matt and his brother revisit their family home for answers. However, Matt does not go into detail about any specific violent encounters. It is merely implied.
Matt Willis gets answers in therapy
In the documentary, Matt Willis speaks to other addicts as well as finally talking to a therapist in order to “become the man I want to be”. The professional suggests that his difficult childhood could have played a part in his battle with addiction.
Matt tells consultant psychiatrist Joanne Stubley: “When I’ve been in therapy in the past, there are certain things that I haven’t really talked about. It’s like the elephant in the room.”
Matt continues: “During my childhood, I had a challenging time at home. But something I struggle with is that I don’t really remember much. I always felt insecure. And, as a child, I always felt very scared.
“So I became a robot. I just shut down.”
Psychiatrist Jo explains that what Matt describes is “an understandable survival response to things not feeling safe”.
She adds: “If you think about what happens to our minds when we are under threat, and particularly children… If something awful is going on, and you can’t run away and you can’t fight, one of the amazing survival techniques we have is that our mind takes off to somewhere else.
“At its most extreme, you take off completely, and detach from the experience. And then you don’t remember it.”
A tearful Matt then listens as Jo describes a study about adverse childhood experiences. She says: “If you have experienced a childhood with domestic abuse, or addiction in the home, or conflict, you are five to seven times more likely to have addictions.”
In retrospect, Matt admits his “addiction has been a solution to the way he was feeling”. He says: “At the root of that is pain. And I can’t expect to feel differently until I address that fully.”
He now says he is ready to face his past via therapy.
Read more: Matt Willis makes shock confession about his wedding to Emma following addiction struggle
Matt Willis: Fighting Addiction airs on Wednesday, May 17, 2023 at 9pm on BBC One and BBC iPlayer.
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