Michelle Heaton became emotional as she opened up about the effect her alcohol addiction had on her children.
The singer appeared on Loose Women today as she spoke about celebrating one year of sobriety.
Michelle admitted that during her addiction battle, she “had no regards to what was happening” to her family.
Michelle Heaton addiction
She said on today’s show: “I had no regards to what was happening to my family.
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“It’s shameful to say that sometimes they were in my way.
“When the kids really needed a cuddle, I just wasn’t there for them.”
She continued: “It wasn’t until I got sober and clean could I recognise how I was behaving.
“And then the guilts come in. Working through guilt in sobriety is tough as well.”
Michelle went on to say that she wasn’t “present for anybody” during her addiction.
She explained: “I wasn’t present for myself. I didn’t give [my children] what they needed, which was nurturing… no nurturing at all.
“When I came out and I started to navigate who I was again, so were the kids… They had to navigate who I was again.”
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She added: “Kids are very forgiving, they didn’t acknowledge how much I was in pain… however, they were navigating my reactions.”
Now Michelle is one year sober and she said she feels “really strong”.
She said: “If somebody told me again nine months ago I’d be feeling free, happy, that feeling of the knots in your stomach and ‘not sure whether I can do this’.
“I think the fear is, ‘Can I actually do this?’ because all I knew the past seven or eight years is active addiction.”
She also said: “It’s hard to think about the new you because you don’t know who you are. I’m glad I made it.
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“But it’s still one day at a time. I still do my programme. I keep it so I can keep my sobriety.”
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