In the early days of reality TV, Sky launched a new show starring stunning model Miriam Rivera. But the battle for ratings ended tragically for the Mexican.
In what is now considered a horrible abuse of trust, and failure to provide duty of care for Miriam – and the other contestants – viewers saw six young men sign up for a reality TV dating show “with a twist”.
There’s Something About Miriam, which aired in 2004, pushed reality TV to the limit – with disastrous consequences, and no regard for those taking part.
Just years later, Miriam was dead.
Here’s everything you need to know about the shocking truth behind Miriam Rivera, and the reality TV show that is now considered one of the most ill-conceived and “cruellest” in TV history.
What was There’s Something About Miriam on Sky about?
There’s Something About Miriam was a reality TV show which aired in 2004, hosted by Tim Vincent. The Miriam of the title was Miriam Rivera, a 21-year-old transgender model from Mexico.
Of course, the title was a play on There’s Something About Mary, the 1998 film starring Cameron Diaz. But that’s where the similarities end, for There’s Something About Miriam was far stranger than fiction.
Looking for love, Miriam Rivera agreed to take part in the six-part reality TV show. Meanwhile, a group of six “average British guys competed to win her affections” – and £10,000 – while living in a luxury Ibiza villa. The so-called “twist” was that Miriam was a trans woman who, at that time, still had male genitalia.
The six men took part in various physical challenges, as well as going on individual and group dates with Miriam Rivera. Brighter Pictures managing director Gavin Hay said “they had made a point of never referring to Miriam as a woman when getting the men to take part”.
Who won There’s Something About Miriam?
Six men competed for Miriam’s affections. These were 24-year-old optician Mark Dimino, 23-year-old student Toby Green, 22-year-old chef Aron Lane, 23-year-old lifeguard Tom Rooke, 22-year-old martial arts expert Scott Gibson, and lastly, 28-year-old Royal Marine Dominic Conway.
In the final episode, Miriam Rivera picked Tom Rooke as her “winner”, and revealed she was a transgender woman who had not yet undergone gender-affirming surgery.
At the time, Miriam Rivera said: “Several of them wondered about me in the first few days. But, as the series unfolded, I really thought that we got to like and know each other as friends and had a lot of fun.”
After revealing Rooke was the winner, she said: “I tried to be honest with all of you, not just some of you. Yes, I am from Mexico, I am a model, and I’m 21. But Tom, I really love spending time with you and kissing you. You see, I love men, and I love being a woman. But you see, Tom… I am not a woman. I was born as a man.”
Tom Rooke initially accepted the prize money. However, he later rejected the prize, and joined the other contestants in a lawsuit that sought to prevent the show from being aired.
While Miriam Rivera became the world’s first transgender reality TV star, it came at a cost. The fallout from the show had far-reaching repercussions for Miriam – and the men who took part.
What happened after There’s Something About Miriam finale?
The men who took part in the reality show were self-confessed “lads”. They undoubtably would not have volunteered to appear on the show had they known the truth about Miriam.
When they discovered that they’d been wooing – and, in some cases, kissing – a trans woman, tempers flared. The shocked male contestants threw furniture, and consulted lawyers, after the show’s climax in which Miriam revealed her “secret”.
Fundraising Manager Aron Lane is now 42, and a father of three. Recalling his time as a contestant on the show, he says: “We were whisked abroad, all expenses paid. It was like a free lads’ holiday.”
However, after the truth was revealed, Aron Lane explained: “Suddenly everything happened at a million miles per hour. Cameramen were crying. Miriam got swept off and we never saw her again. I would’ve liked a conversation about what she might have been going through. We’ll never have that opportunity.”
Of course, the producers at the time claimed they were helping to raise awareness of transgenderism, but others would argue it was all about ratings and money.
Psychologist Dr Gareth Smith says now. “The fact that Miriam had a penis seemed to be the punchline to a joke. But it wasn’t a joke. It was Miriam and her life. These boys didn’t have the option to consent. It was cruelty television. […] Reality TV was brand new and a bit like the wild west.”
The show subsequently aired later than planned as a result of the problems behind the scenes. It went out in February 2004. Unsurprisingly, the series only ran for one year, and was not recommissioned. Sky apologised and removed the show from all its platforms.
Was there a law suit against Sky after Miriam Rivera reality TV show?
There’s Something About Miriam was scheduled to air in November 2003, but was delayed as a result of a lawsuit. After filming ended on the show, the contestants sued Sky.
They alleged conspiracy to commit sexual assault, defamation, breach of contract, and personal injury in the form of psychological and emotional damage.
The men eventually settled for an undisclosed amount, and the show premiered on February 22, 2004.
Psychologist reveals Miriam was ‘looking for love’
Glasgow psychologist Dr Gareth Smith was tasked with counselling the men who had appeared on There’s Something About Miriam. And he admits he had fears they might “murder” the transgender star.
He once revealed the competitors were so angry, they threatened to murder the model. Talking to the podcast Harsh Reality in 2022, he said: “It had the potential for absolute disaster.
“They started with ‘that [bleep] bitch Miriam. I’m going to [bleep] kill her’. That was my worry that it would escalate, that they would wind each other up and it would turn violent.”
Gareth said telly bosses thought it would all be fine. He said: “My heart sank a little bit. I remember just thinking ‘you have no [bleep] idea what is going to kick off here’.”
Gareth also spoke to Miriam before the finale, and reveals that she really thought she could find love on the series. He said: “She genuinely thought this could go well and she could go on this yacht and it would be lovely.
“I felt sorry for her. I knew for a fact she was going to get rejected.”
Miriam: Death of a Reality Star on Channel 4
Channel 4‘s new three-part documentary series reexamines the horror show that was There’s Something About Miriam in 2004. The series is described as a British reality show which “firebombed the life of beautiful model Miriam Rivera”.
The new series aims to uncover the story of one of the most controversial TV events of the last 20 years, and the questions that remain unanswered.
The first episode of the three-parter paints a picture of who Miriam was, and introduces us to those closest to her. We also meet two of the original six contestants, while the production psychiatrist freely admits it was a stupid and dangerous idea for a show. Members of the production team also cooperate and reveal what went wrong.
Talking about the TV series, Creative Director Colin Barr said: “Miriam’s story is a fable for the ages, not only shining a light on the perils of fame but our shifting attitudes to towards gender identity. This series is a chance to restore Miriam’s reputation as a true pioneer who was ahead of her time but was made to pay a heavy price for it.”
Alisa Pomeroy, Head of Documentaries, added: “Using popular culture as a lens to explore contemporary history has become something of a hallmark for c4 Documentaries, a lineage that started with our multi award-winning Jade: The Reality Star who Changed Britain.
“But Miriam’s story is particularly special and revealing as it’s one that is utterly unique to its time. Hers is a tale that couldn’t have pre-existed the early noughties, reminding us of a time that – although only 20 years ago – now feels lightyears away in terms of attitudes and representation.”
What did go SO wrong?
It’s important to remember – although far from forgivable – that these were the early days of reality TV. The very first Big Brother had aired in 2000, just three years before filming began on There’s Something About Miriam.
In 2004, the same year There’s Something About Miriam aired, trans woman Nadia Almada appeared on Big Brother UK – and ultimately won the show with 74 per cent of the vote.
Twenty years ago, attitudes to trans people were very different to today. The set up of There’s Something About Miriam was surely not to raise awareness of trans issues, but for the winner to be shocked on discovering Miriam still had male genitalia.
The British Medical Journal said: “The premise was not a celebration of transgender people’s lives. It was designed to elicit horror from the winning contestant, discovering that his dream date had a penis.”
Whichever way you look at it, even if Miriam was complicit, the men were made to look foolish. And Miriam was just 21 at the time, and undoubtedly unaware of the pitfalls of appearing on reality TV.
Understandably, the show was also criticised by transgender groups, who feared a backlash of public opinion. And don’t forget, this was WAY before Love Island was put under scrutiny for being linked to three suicides.
In 2004, reality TV was still very much in its infancy, and the rights of the contestants not at the forefront of broadcaster’s minds.
Who was reality TV star Miriam Rivera?
As described in the C4 documentary Miriam: Death of a Reality Star, Miriam experienced a turbulent childhood before transitioning.
Born as Hugo Cesar, she was assigned male at birth but always felt different to her three brothers. She would play with dolls while her siblings preferred baseball. When she was 11, she started taking hormones, despite her father attempting to carry out an exorcism to “cure” her.
At the brutally young age of 14, Hugo – now called Miriam – travelled to Tijuana, then the US in search of a better life. She soon found herself on the New York ballroom scene. She subsequently arrived in the UK to join transgender girl band Speed Angels.
This was when TV producer Remy Blumenfeld first spotted her, and later cast her in There’s Something About Miriam. He said it was “a social experiment about gender and sexuality”.
What happened to Miriam Rivera after the reality TV show?
After appearing on There’s Something About Miriam, the star of the show became infamous worldwide, and a regular in the tabloids. In 2004, she went on to become a guest on Big Brother Australia.
But Miriam’s youngest brother Ariel Mendoza believes his sister was “broken” by the experience. While the male contestants had each other for support, Miriam was left isolated.
He says: “My sister was exploited, then abandoned. She was alone in a foreign country. Miriam was a tough girl but it broke her.”
As the men involved in the show sued the show, tabloid headlines ridiculed Miriam – rather than the TV executives who had dreamt up the idea in the first place.
He brother added: “She was upset when they sued the show. The press trashed her. People blamed her. Some still do. I recently saw a Facebook reel saying ‘Look who fooled some guys on TV by pretending to be a woman’. After the show, Miriam went down and down. She looked sad whenever it was mentioned. Maybe she was ahead of her time but I hope her story teaches tolerance.”
Sadly, Miriam’s TV career eventually came to an end after a brief post-series flurry of activity. She went back to the US, but friends believed she had PTSD. Miriam eventually began to depend on drugs.
In 2007, she fell four storeys from her apartment balcony, leaving her in critical condition. She later disappeared for six months, and claimed she had been kidnapped at gunpoint and forced into sex slavery. At the time of her death, she was back living in Mexico.
Where is Miriam now? How did she die?
In 2019, 15 years after appearing on the Sky show, Miriam was tragically found dead in her mother’s apartment – on exactly the same spot as her eldest brother Luis died 13 years previously. Her death was recorded as suicide, although some believe she was murdered.
Miriam was just 38 when she died.
Her youngest brother Ariel Mendoza reveals that his sister was “struggling with depression”. He added: “She’d always provided for our family. Now she was back home with nothing. Our mum, Maria, just wanted to blame someone. It was her second time going through that loss. She’s the strongest person I know but it broke her heart. She’ll never be the same again.”
Miriam Rivera was ‘a prisoner in her own reality TV show’
Speaking now in the documentary, former contestant Aron Lane reveals his biggest regrets about taking part in the Sky show There’s Something About Miriam.
He says: “I don’t regret the lawsuit. Our beef was with the TV company, not Miriam. I do regret her becoming collateral damage and the domino effect it might’ve had.”
He adds: “She was like a prisoner in her own TV show. A character rather than a person. They made her a laughing stock, which was cruel. I would’ve loved to make this documentary with Miriam still with us. It’s desperately sad.”
Miriam: Death of a Reality Star starts on Monday, April 29, 2024 at 9pm on Channel 4. Episodes 2 and 3 air on the consecutive Tuesday and Wednesday.
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