The Apprentice episode 4 and this year’s motley mob of business-heads were tasked with catching fish and selling it to high-end clients while also preparing it as a dish to sell on the beach in Cornwall.
An easy task?
Well, not for this lot, as you can well imagine.
While stupidity on The Apprentice is usually across the board, this week it was cute but dim Alex Short who’d clearly flushed his braincells down the toilet.
Heading to Greenwich at the crack of dawn, Lord Sugar informed the teams of their fishy task and balanced the teams out by moving Alex over to woman-heavy Infinity.
And it headed downhill from there…
1. AMY THROWS ALEX UNDER THE BUS
While discussing who should be PM, all heads were sheepishly bowed, except for enthusiastic Kathryn, who bravely said she’d take on the role if no-one else felt they could do it.
But conniving Amy piped up and threw poor gullible Alex under the bus by telling him she thought it was the perfect task for him to undertake as he had experience in sales and tendering.
Clearly feeling pushed into it, Alex mumbled in his monotone way that he was happy to be PM!
The fool!
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2. INFINITY MAKE A PLAN
After a short debate, the group decided that crab would be their catch of the day, which Karren pointed out, away from the team, that if they wanted to make large quantities of food for the public they’d need to catch a lot.
Agreed on the fish, Alex said he wanted serve up a simple classic dish. Amy suggested crab burger which they all agreed would be easy to make and popular with customers.
With the sub team – comprising Steph, Sophie and Amy – heading off to Cornwall to catch crabs, Alex, Akshay and Kathryn went to a fish market in London to select some fish to sell to corporate clients before placing an order with the team mates in Cornwall.
3. TRYING TO PLAY THE CHEF
Monkfish and plaice were team Infinity’s fish of choice and with growing confidence they rocked up to the swanky Biltmore Hotel in London to start negotiations.
To begin with, things appeared to being going swimmingly as the chef happily accepted Alex’s suggested £25.50 per kg for monkfish.
But when it came to the plaice, Alex boasted that there’d be plenty of good fish coming their way as the fish was in season.
However when the chef hastily pointed out that the fish being in season normally pushed the price down, it was clear that the wheels in Alex’s empty head had started spinning furiously out of control.
After an uncomfortable moment flicking through his pad of doodles, Alex drawled, ‘We were thinking at the 12.50 mark,’ which the chef laughed at, explaining that he expected to pay 50% of that.
Then, as if that exchange hadn’t just happened, Alex said, “I know we are catching some good fish, so I think going in at around the £7.50 mark would be a really good price.’
The chef agreed.
4. THEIR BIG MISTAKE
Shaking on it, Alex, Akshay and Kathryn sheepishly left the room, only to realise they had forgotten to mention the all-important catch of the day that could have led to them gaining some big orders.
Trying to look on the bright side, Akshay said it was probably better not to have mentioned it in case the team in Cornwall hadn’t caught enough crabs.
As it turns out, down in Cornwall, Amy, Stephanie and Sophie had a very fruitful day on their boat catching the blighters, even if the girls did squeal every time a snappy crab nipped them with their claws.
5. ALEX CHANGES HIS MIND
Back in London, Alex, pressed by Akshay, decided to ditch the original plan of making crab burgers in favour of arancini, as they decided that less crab meat would be used in the preparation and giving them more to sell.
When Kathryn pointed out that people might be more likely to snap up a crab burger and chips, Alex didn’t budge and stuck with arancini all the way.
When the sub team heard this surprise development, they were confused, but not as shocked as they were when Alex confessed that he had forgotten to mention the catch of the day to the hotel chef.
“It’s mind-blowing to me,” Steph sniped to the other girls on the boat. “Our propose was to fish for crab but they didn’t think of selling it to the corporate client.”
6. ALEX MUCKS UP AGAIN!
While arancini balls may be tasty, they don’t really look very high end.
So to give them more value so they could hike up the prices, the motley crew decided to add rocket and garlic mayonnaise instead of a decent side, which left Karren Brady looking on bewildered.
Speaking to camera out of ear shoot, she sniped, ‘They’ve decided to add garlic mayo and rocket to their dish. But that’s a garnish, that’s not something that is adding value that makes it look more expensive and creates a higher price margin. Ouch!
Later when his sub team arrived at the kitchen to prepare the arancini for the beach, they were surprised to discover that there was nothing to serve with them.
When the girls asked if the other team had thought of anything that would add value to the meal – for example chips – they were shocked to hear that they expected the addition of mayo and rocket would woo more customers.
7. KARREN POINTS OUT ANOTHER ERROR
Later Alex and Akshay headed to the kitchen to prepare the fish for the hotel, without Kathryn, who’d cleverly ducked of work out claiming she was sick. (Yeah, sick of this madness!)
While they deboned the fish, Karren asked them when they had promised to deliver the batch to the hotel.
Responding to her in his usual monotone way, Alex simply admitted he’d forgotten.
Karren, however, couldn’t believe what she was hearing and said afterwards, ‘When you’re taking an order for a product it is important that you get the time right is really important especially if you don’t know if it’s for lunch or dinner. I mean by this stage it’ll Sunday lunch next week by thee time they get there.”
8. ALEX’S NEXT MISTAKE
When team Infinity finally arrived at the Biltmore, a very disappointed chef explained they had got there too late for the lunch menu and grudgingly said that he might be able to use the fish for dinner.
Because of this delay, the chef asked them to reduce the amount he was due to pay.
After a little haggling, the chef agreed to buy the fish for £22.75 a kilo.
9. AKSHAY STICKS HIS OAR IN
Later, when Alex and Akshay hit the streets of London trying to sell their remaining fish to a wholesaler, they made yet another pig’s ear of it.
Alex began negotiations at £12 a fish, but Akshay suddenly chipped in telling their customers the fish is ‘literally from the sea’ and offered to sell the fish £10 a piece.
Eventually they agreed on £9.
Alex wasn’t happy, accusing Akshay of starting too low, but then who’s he to talk when it comes to making dumb decisions?
10. THE BOARDROOM SHOWDOWN
Back in the boardroom, Lord Sugar revealed that Infinity had spent £439 85p and sold 556.41p, leaving them with a profit of £116.56p.
However, even though Diversity had spent more – £549.53p – they also took a lot more £861.95p, giving them a profit £312,.42
With the other team dismissed to enjoy a lavish prize, Lord Sugar admitted he was horrified that Alex hadn’t mentioned the catch of the day to the client and laughed hollowly that the mayo and the rocket cost more than the crabs.
Alex hit out at Amy for dropping the price of the arancini too soon, which she wasn’t happy about in the slightest.
But when it came down to choosing who to bring back to the boardroom for a firing, Alex chose his own sub team because he felt they’d made the biggest mistake and thought he shouldn’t take the blame alone.
However, Lord Sugar appeared shocked that Alex hadn’t picked wicked Amy who had pushed him into defeat.
Worst ever
During his conflab with Karren and Tim, Lord Sugar said that he was considering firing all three of the candidates as he thought it was the worst failure ever to hit the boardroom, due mainly to the fact that Alex had forgotten to sell the crab to the chef.
Giving the three the chance to fight their case, Sugar finally came to a decision about who should leave.
While he hinted that Akshay may leave as this was the fourth time he’d been dragged back into the ballroom, he ended up telling the team that the dispatch of the day would be Alex.
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